A Letter to my Younger Self

Dear Hannah

You don't really watch doctor who right now (you should) but let's just say you've managed to hop aboard a cool time travelling box with a handsome man to deliver this letter to your 17 year old self. You're currently pregnant, 1st or 2nd trimester, that wasn't clever but dont worry it'll all be fine. Your daughter won't sleep much so you should cram that in rather than watching trashy tv until late. Make sure you talk more and be honest with those around you. You're going to be exhausted, sore. Start speaking up for yourself. You'll never be one for confrontation or giving your opinion but you do start to say 'no' more often in the future, I'd suggest you go for it now. A room full of people will want to visit you when your baby girl isn't even 24 hours old. Please say no, or make sure someone says no, please!!

Save your money. You don't particularly waste it but you do have plenty of moments of spending a bit too much. Trust me you'll need the pennies, there's a few spanners in your future works. You'll get through it but it would be easier without borrowing money. I can't tell you more than that. If I do you won't end up in the lovely place you are now.

Things will be tough for a few years but you're not alone. Communicate with your future husband (yes you do get married, and yes it is in 2012 like he always said so stop badgering him and wasting your time, having arguments etc, you are so lucky to have him) Don't do that college course you're thinking about, it'll be seriously bad for you, not doing it doesn't change your future it'll just make your anxiety worse. Don't worry, you'll break your anxiety to a certain degree, I'm still working on the rest, we dogreat things!

A few other pointers: Stay in the birthing pool, don't destroy your diaries and notebooks because you will wish you had them still. You love to write, you have loads of pen friends; it's your favourite hobby! So is keeping memories and you'll often wish you had kept more than one silly year 7 Winnie the Pooh calendar dairy! Finally, very soon you'll be totally banished to the free from aisle in the supermarket. Don't carry on eating and making yourself feel like a fat sick thing, I happily condone the spending of some of those saved pennies on chocolates you love, cereals that actually stop tasting like cardboard (you better believe it!) and oh yes, pretty soon you'll be able to get cakes, biggish cakes that you can scoff all to yourself (you do, you're pregnant, no one judges you. Well may be a bit) so I'd suggest a stock up of those.

All my love

Hannah (you) xxxxx

Ps Don't eat quite so much after the babies, don't buy a bed from pound stretcher, don't dither about blogging because it's the making of you in many ways and lastly, don't lose yourself. I'm struggling to find a bit of the old you, the you you're soon to be in a few years. Fun, crafty, really happy. Hold on to that for me. Oh, and don't get a dog, your Dads right..

Cupcake Mumma

This post was written in partnership with Legal & General as part of their 'what would you say to your younger self' campaign.

Papery Love! #2

Today I am sharing some papery love (inspired by The Reading Residence's #bringbackpaper) I have notebooks, stickers and books to share with you all. Enjoy!

What I've Read:

Very different from my normal book reading, I've gone with a bit of harmless chic lit in the form Fiona Niell's The Secret Life of The Slummy Mummy. I can never identify with these novels although I think you're supposed to in way (at least to make you feel better) but I have laughed out loud a few times and certainly cringed, I managing myself as Lucy in a few of her highly embarrassing situations.

What I'm Reading:

I'm currently reading another nursing book titled 'Catching Babies.' Since reading The New Arrival I have fallen in love with these real life accounts of nursing, health visiting and midwifery in the 70's and onwards. I really recommend this book, as I did the previous title.

Up Next:
Back to the usual stuff for me with more Tudor related reading. I'll be picking up Betrayal in the Tudor Court as my next book to lose myself in.

Now some papery love! I bought some dessert themed stickers to add to my letters from Fox and Star who is a fantastic seller and has lovely items on her Etsy store. I purchased a gorgeous notepad from Waterstones for just under £3 whilst I had a break from a recent blogging event to explore Exeter a little.

 Finally, I ordered a selection of vintage inspired cards to make some cards for swaps and special occasions.

I purchased a pack of vintage cards for a recent gift swap.

Do you like any of my recent buys? Do you have any papery love to share? Leave me your posts below!



Cupcake Mumma

Excessive Blushing

The heat on my face: unbearable. A heatwave rushing through my body. Head to toe. All eyes on me, laughter, whispers, I  dare not look up. If I look up they will see my fear, the tears stinging my eyes. Finally I'm done. I'm done shaking, I'm done fighting the need to run, to get away from these terrifyingly insensitive bullies. Some 'friends'. Some not friends. 

For as long as I can remember I have been a sufferer of anxiety. The most crippling is my social anxiety. Oh how many lessons I spent with my feet up on a school loo to hide from the humiliation of oral presentations I cannot tell you. Teachers didn't understand my fear. A genuine, crippling fear of speaking in front of people.

The start of my social anxiety is incredibly easy to pin point. It's also incredibly painful. I was ten years old, I had to make some stupid guitar at home out of take away boxes and elastic bands. I repeated the words 'please not me', over and over in my head. Then my name:

A-Z Challenge I - I'm Not Perfect!

Yes, I'm not perfect.

I wanted to share with you all a few reasons why I am not perfect. Not at all. Not in the slightest despite the pink, the prettiness, the crafty posts and all those family outings. I like not being perfect, I like being normal I just don't blog it because if I did well, you'd all be bored!

So here we are, I...

1) I spend at least 2 days a week in my PJ pants. If I have nothing to do and no where to go then I have no one to dress for. I will quite happily chill out with my boy while Midge is at school and relax! Alright so I have to clean up and cook, do all the usual stuff but I don't need jeans for that! The postman is used to my attire too so I don't even have to care about him!

2) Sometimes I let my baps run wild on the school run. I don't have a large chest which makes me happy. Now, I don't walk around bra-less in a t-shirt but under a good hoody and/or a coat I'm good to go. I hate bras alright? *burns bra*

3) I swear. A lot. It's a nasty habit that I really need to break! I actually think a girl who swears is pretty unattractive to be honest...Good job there's no one to attract anymore!! No seriously, I am trying but it's very hard. I owe the swear jar over £10. That's mainly to pay it back though to be honest. I liked that bag I saw...

4) I don't make homemade meals every night. Lots of people don't but they don't admit it do they? I'm not talking about take outs because not many people have a problem admitting they have a good old take out perhaps every week. We actually honestly don't do take outs but we do do chips and chicken nuggets or fish fingers. The biggest dinner in our house? The one which gets the children real excited? Cereal dinner night!

A big bowl of chosen cereal, a plate of toast, a drink of choice and a nice big banana, maybe some pudding too. A seriously yummy dinner although perhaps not very filling I don't know. My children enjoy the meal and they don't complain of hunger at 3am so I'm not about to feel bad about my weekly 'lazy tea.'

5) My children don't sleep. OK one does (finally, after 3 years of not) but one doesn't. I'm tired a lot of the time which means I'm not always the nicest Wife or Mother. I feel bad about that of course I do but again, I'm not perfect, I'm not a robot and I'm also allergic to lack of sleep* 

So there you go. My blog would drive me nuts if I wrote about how low I often felt, how fed up I am of Max and bloody Ruby at 12am. No one would want to read it trust me. I write my blog so I can look back and remember those cakes I baked with Midge and that mess my children made with big smiles on their faces. If that makes people think I'm a perfect little housewife then that's fine. Just so you know though, I'm not (no matter how much I wish I was!)

*may be an exaggeration

An 'I'm not perfect' cake fail (and it's a microwave cake which we all know is just lazy)

CupcakeMumma

My Mothering Sunday

Photo by Midge

 I had such a lovely day yesterday. It all changed a bit last minute because Husband was called and asked to play football for a rather good team so he said he'd make up the lack of breakfast in bed for a nice dinner!

The children brought me up some toast, a large card and a new pillow while I sat in bed waking up. I had some cuddles before getting up, saying goodbye to Husband and getting ready for the day. We all waited for Grandma to come so we could go over to Great Grandma's house as a surprise for Mother's Day. It was a lovely day and as an extra surprise, my Aunt and Uncle had arrived as well! I haven't seen them since my wedding so it was a lovely little family day.

We had a massive lunch and a choice of 3 desserts (I had a bit of all 3- pig!) but it was so delicious I couldn't help myself! The children found Great Grandma's special room where she meditates which fascinated them. What they really loved about the room though was it is Fleas little room to relax when there are a lot of people around.

Playing and stroking Flea

Little Man brought his trains with him and  made a point of chatting a load of nonsense, being loud and spending some quality time with his Great Uncle. It was lovely to see. Midge played and spent time looking around at Great Grandmas various treasures. She helped lay the table and was really good about eating her dinner. She was really sad to leave and asked if we were staying the night!

When we arrived home it was really nice to see Husband as I had missed him. He had a good game, had done the washing up and was all set to cook me roast when I had to break it to him I'd already had a massive roast for lunch complete with a large pudding helping! He was fine with it and put on some tea for him and some hash browns with peas for me- that was about all I could manage!

I had a lovely Mothers Day so thank-you Little Man and Midge!

xx

Photo A Day September

September 1st 

Me Right Now

Here's me right now. Actually it was at midnight yesterday but that still counts. I'm looking a bit tired, definitely ready for bed but I remember being too engrossed in Pinterest to actually move myself off of the sofa and besides, I've taken to being under my quilt at any given opportunity lately so I'm often reluctant to move myself anyway!

Oh yes, and I have new glasses. Some would say they're basically the same as the ones before but they're not. They sit better for a start so I actually wear them, which I'm told is the whole point of owning glasses...They also have white on the frame inside but obviously you can't see that so will just have to take my word for it.

All in all not too shabby. What do you think?

CupcakeMumma